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OH THE DRAMA...
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lundi, janvier 09, 2006
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i know it's horrible to post this, but i couldn't pass it up. GO TEXANS! *hehe*
The lighter side,
Sign of the times......
The Houston Texans
Q: What do you call 47 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl?
A: The Houston Texans.
Q: What do the Houston Texans and Billy Graham have in common?
A: They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ."
Q: How do you keep a Houston Texan out of your yard?
A: Put up goal posts.
Q: Where do you go in Houston in case of a tornado?
A: To Reliant Stadium - they never get a touchdown there.
Q: What do you call a Houston Texan with a Super Bowl ring?
A: A thief.
Q: Why doesn't San Antonio have a professional football team?
A: Because then Houston would want one.
Q: What's the difference between the Houston Texans and a dollar bill?
A: You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
Q: How many Houston Texans does it take to win a Super Bowl?
A: Nobody knows and we may never find out.
Q: What do the Houston Texans and possums have in common?
A: Both play dead at home and get killed on the road.
2006 TEXANS SCHEDULE
September 14................Taft Junior High School
September 21...............Cub Scout Troop #101
September 28................Houston Blind Academy
October 05.................Spanish American War Vets
October 12................ Crippled Children's Home
October 19............... Montgomery Mental Hospital
October 26................ Girl Scout Troop # 353
November 02.................Texas Venereal Disease Clinic
November 09.................Sugarland Boys Choir
November 16.................Korean Amputees
SPECIAL MONDAY NIGHT GAME
December 08..................Cypress Gay Boys Club
** RULE CHANGES FROM LAST YEAR **
1 - When playing polio patients, the Texans must not disconnect knee braces.
2 - When playing the Blind Academy, the Texans must not hide the football under their jerseys.
** RULES THE SAME FROM LAST YEAR **
1 - A touchdown (this is when the ball is carried over the goal line for all you Texans fans that have never seen this) it is still worth 6 points.
2 - The Texans will be allowed 20 men on the field at all times.
3 - The Texans will be allowed to substitute with band members at anytime.
4 - The Texans will be awarded 10 timeouts as opposed to 3 for the opposing team.
5 - The Texans will be awarded a first down with each gain of three yards or more, instead of the usual ten yards.
** NAME CHANGE **
The Houston Texans will be changed to the "Houston Tampons" as they are only good for one period and have no second string.
** COACHING CHANGES **
Dom Capers will be replaced by Monica Lewinsky. She will no doubt blow a few, but she ertainly won't choke on the big ones!!!
5:27 PM
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